Monday, November 3, 2008

I will clean your clock!

I think some people really want me to hit them. Seriously, they want me to punch them right between the eyes and knock them out. Why do people insist on working my nerves? Yeah, really haven't figured that one out yet, but if you know the answer, please enlighten me. I'd love to know the answer.

Okay, so I am highly stressed right now because this is a huge week at work. I've been working on this for months. Now that the event is right in front of my face, I'm totally flipping out because everything is hitting me at once. I'm getting slammed from all sides. I want to hold up a sign and wave a white flag, yelling "I surrender!" but I don't think that is going to fly.

I've tried to let things roll off my back, but when people continue to ask me the same questions over and over again or they are just downright heinous, you can't help but fell the need to clean their clock. I mean, even if you ask me a million times, the answer to the question isn't going to change. In fact, if you keep asking me I think that I have free reign to go all bat shit crazy on your ass and scratch your eyes out. Seriously, It's like you are just asking for it. It's an open invitation in my book.

Yes, I am a pain in the ass. That's well known, but most of the time I am a nice person until people make me mad and push me to my limit and then, it's game on! All bets are off and you'd better not cross the Diva once you've done that because you could be in serious trouble,

I had to work at the nursing home tonight, which wouldn't have been so bad had I not woken up at 3:00 this morning, getting just 3 and a half hours of sleep. I was not in the mood to deal with idiot's who can't read, who keep pulling on the door and look at you like you're dumb because they are too damn stupid to follow directions. This lady came in tonight and she refused to push the button to get in the door, like we should just open the door for her because she is just so fabulous. Whatever sister, think again. Unless you are Miss Dorothy in her cute little Jazzy and you can't open the door and maneuver your wheelchair at the same or you are the cute little guy with the walker who can't push the button and open the door at the same time, I am not pushing that button for you. Okay, I will push it for the lady who has two kids, one of whom is in a pumpkin seat because she can't push the button without putting the baby seat on the floor and that isn't necessary. No Ms. I am not pushing the button doesn't fit in any of those categories. She brings some dog in with her, which I think is a big no no, but it's not worth fighting with her. So, Miss I'm Too Good leaves and comes back in (not hitting the button..."Hit the red button") and she is in a big tizzy. Someone is blocking her and she can't get out. OMG! Please leave because you are annoying. I page the person who is blocking her in. They don't come out. She is all up in arms, telling me she is going to call the cops and have the car towed. Whatever, I doubt she knows how to pick up the phone on her own, let alone dial. She gets all honked off because the person blocking her in won't come down so she goes back outside to see if she can get her car out. The blocking driver comes out and I guess they almost came to blows. One of the residents was out there and saw it all happen. Miss Priss came back in and demanded to have the name of the company the blocking driver worked for.... then, when the resident came in I found out Miss Priss was parked illegally in a handicapped parking spot!! She shouldn't even have been where she was, had she not been parked there, she wouldn't have gotten blocked in in the first place. Had I known this, I would have thumped her ass and good. SUH-CUR-ITY!!!!

Now that I have been up for 18 hours, I think it is time to go to bed. I have to get up early so I can vote before work. I am a heinous bitch, but at least I do have some redeeming qualities.... I do turn off the water when I brush my teeth and I give things to charity. Until next time, Diva Divine

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